Sunday, April 11, 2010

Perhaps the Black Dress?

What a mixed bag today was.

I managed to slip into my running shoes at around 7am when the sun from a beautiful Autumn morning called to me from the little beeping noise inside my mobile.

The run was super. No traffic, no people, just sun and sky and Broadway's greatest in my ear. What made me feel amazing on my return is Justin and Tuneil sharing a beautiful breakfast with My Sister and Brendan. All seated around the breakfast table.

My usual 35g of cereal tasted so much better served with a large dose of good friends and cool plans such as CAMPING: MARK 2 and KENNEY'S FAREWELL PICNIC.

For such a swell morning, some dark clouds rained on my domestic parade. Amongst my organising for next Sunday's BBQ, and cleaning of the house (which included a refreshing and satisfying rearangement of all kitchen drawers, cupboards and pantries) was a phone call from my Mother. Actually, Dad had called for Louise and then gave the phone to Mum to talk to me.

Now, this seemlessly harmless action quickly spiraled into a flurry of insanity, violence and home invasion. I shall explain.

Mum had forgot Tuneil and Justin's name temporarily so asked "did your friends come last night". I mistook this (as my brain often mistakes things) to mean "why didn't you invite friends?"

My response apparently SHOULD have gone something like this:

"Tuneil? Yeah! she had an awesome time. Okay, see ya later Mum"

Instead, I was trying to logically explain why I felt the lack of want to invite any of my friends to my sister's toilet opening. It came out very oddly, and for the most part Mum seemed to find this really annoying. And trying to press my point that I realised my mistake, while explaining why I had made an interpretation error seemed to make things incredibly worse.

5 minutes later, and continuing to argue about how I don't communicate with my family left my Father who was waiting to take Mum to the movies in a real testy mood because a) they are now late and will probably miss the ads and b) it was Mum's idea to go in the first place.

ONE word from him was all it took for WWIII to break out over the phone and I just hung up.

I unplugged the house phone and tried to calm down with some classical music and tea. This seemed to be working until my Mother started to call my mobile. I hang up. around 8 times. I dont know what state you are from, but in the United States of Kenney, this clearly is a sign that I don't want to talk right now. So when she turns up in the driveway, I just lock the doors, and close the blinds and sit down, giving clear evidence I do not want to interact while so irrationally worked up and emotional.

Needless to say, they had a key. Which lead to a very out of hand situation. When I get this angry, I either a) shut down completely and avoid doing anything or b) scream yell and otherwise throw shit around the room.

I don't know if it was the right choice, but I chose option a).

Trying to mentally and physically keep my Mother out of my life is an exhaustive process. So when she tried to keep pushing and keep advancing I lashed out, not caring as one often does in situations where their parents have invaded the house, clearly uninvited. Mum's hand got stuck in the door she was trying to force open. I stayed my course tho. I was surprised that my door didn't snap in two. The amount of force applied was astronomical.

Eventually they left and I cried myself stupid for 20 minutes. I felt dead. I still feel dead. I felt so alone.

And this is why I made 4 cheese macaroni and cheese and proceeded to get more depressed when I couldn't eat it.

Fruit of the Moment: Leftovers

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